I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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