Do you still have your period?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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