Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
