That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
When are your genitals available?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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