i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
