apparently the secret to your success is patron
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
