Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
They have beer where we have blood.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
