So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize