Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
