She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Your cock deserves a montage
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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