Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
