It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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