You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
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