Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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