i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Randomize
