Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
