maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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