i need an iv and a liver transplant
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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