that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
