PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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