I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
