When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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