There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Randomize
