Me too!
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
