Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
