He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
