no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
