she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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