We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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