**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
