I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
