in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
