I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I stole a fireplace last night.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
