i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
