I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I came so hard my ears popped.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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