Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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