love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
