I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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