never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
