I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
