4 words: hood of his car
She announced her abortion via fbk
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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