Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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