Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
