yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Randomize
