The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
