Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
