dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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