at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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