You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
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