the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
