so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
